Opening My Creative Doors!

 I’m doing it. It’s done. It’s set up and ready to go. By the time this post is live, my photography doors will be open. (Check it out here!)

It feels small in the grand scheme of things, and I’m not blind to what’s going on in the world these days. But doing this for me, carving out my spot to just be me, feels right. This is the time, crazy and uncertain as it is. This is my golden hour, my blue hour, my best seller status, my higher calling. 

I can feel the change slipping through my fingers like gentle waves against the shore. With each release is a recapture of what once was, and what can be. A reminder that she's still in here, still breathing the life through all the fuckery that came before. 

This feels both the biggest and the smallest step I’ve ever made, and I can see the other big/small steps that led me here. Each step seemed wrong, didn’t fit with the previous steps I’d taken. The previous roads I started down. Yet here I am, on another precipice, feeling the strong winds of the past and future fighting over which direction I fall. 

Every precipice is an opportunity to soar, to fight the currents, the glide and to fall. Every precipice leads to the next one, and each one grows bigger and smaller at the same time. 

Leading up to the launch of this web shop, I've faced challenges that threatened to turn me off course. To pull me into questioning the validity of my life and passions. Again, I'm reminded over and over that the Universe has me. That these things strengthen myself, heal things, and move in the right direction. I've leaned into journaling and speaking with safe people in these times, and the support and gift of friendships is astounding. 

Where am I going with this? 

I expected this post to turn out differently, but it turned out how it's supposed to. Full of truth and the reality of where I'm at. The mess that life makes when one is trying to live according to their intuition. It's not always pretty. In fact, I suspect that living a life such as this redefines beauty and truly living. It transforms us from passive spectators to the valiant heroes we've longed to be. 

Heroes of our own stories, our own personal heroes' journey. There's a part of the story called the Dark Night of The Soul. In this part, the hero takes time to process everything that's happened. They are usually worse off and questioning everything. This is just before the hero finds the solution to the problem and learns their lesson. (Take loosely from Save The Cat! Writes A Novel, by Jessica Brody pg. 26) This is where I'm at, where I've been, for months now. Each event, each step, has carried its own moment before the dawn and this feels like another one.  

Making my space in the world, and trusting the intentions I've spoke aloud into becoming, fills me with a wildly beating heart that is truly breathing fully for the first time in decades. Welcome to the space I've made to heal my inner child, my inner teen, and all aspects of myself. Through creativity, I soar and dance with the cosmos.